More Jokes


A little kid walks in on his parents having sex. He says, "What are yall doing?"

His mom says, "Well I was just letting the air out of your dad, he is to fat."

The kid says,"Why the lady next door is just going to blow him up again!"



A little girl runs out to the backyard where her father is working, and asks him, "Daddy, what's sex?"

Her father sits her down, and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse, sperms and eggs. He goes on to tell her about puberty, menstruation, erections, wet-dreams...and he thinks, what the hell, and goes on to tell her the works.

He covers a wide and varied assortment of sub topics and by the time he's finished, his daughter is somewhat awestruck with this sudden influx of bizarre new knowledge. Her father finally asks: "So what did you want to know about sex for?"

"Oh, mommy said to tell you lunch would be ready in a couple of secs..."





What's the difference between a ritz cracker and a lesbian?

One's a snack cracker, the other a crack snacker!



There was a guy who got in an elevator with very large man. The large man said, "I'm 7 feet 3 inches, 350 pounds, with a 20 inch penis, a right nut of 3 pounds and a left nut of 3 pounds. Turner Brown."

All the sudden the little guy fainted. When he was awake again he asked "What did you say?"

The guy repeated, "7-3, 350 pounds, 20 inch penis, right nut 3 pounds, left nut 3 pounds. Turner Brown."

"Oh," said the little guy, "I thought you said turn around!"



An old man and an old lady are getting ready for bed one night when all of a sudden the woman bursts out of the bathroom, flings open her robe and yells: "Super Pussy!"

The old man says: "I'll have the soup."





A man and his wife have been stranded on a deserted island for many years. One day another man washes up on shore. He and the wife are very attracted to each other right away, but realize certain protocols must be observed.

The husband, however, is very glad to see the second man there. "Now we will be able to have three people doing eight hour shifts in the watchtower, rather than two people doing 12-hour shifts."

The new man is only too happy to help and in fact volunteers to do the first shift. He climbs up the tower and is soon standing watch. Soon the husband and wife start placing stones in a circle to make a fire to cook supper. The second man yells down, "Hey, no fucking!"

They yell back, "We're not fucking!" A few minutes later they start to put driftwood into the stone circle. Again the second man yells down, "Hey, no fucking!" Again they yell back, "We're not fucking!" Later they are putting palm leaves on the roof of their shack to patch leaks. Once again the second man yells down, "Hey, I said no fucking!" They yell back, "We're not fucking!!"

Finally the shift is over so the second man climbs down from the tower and the husband starts to climb up. He's not even halfway up before the wife and second man are screwing each other's brains out. The husband looks out from the tower and says, "Son-of-a-gun. From up here it DOES look like they're fucking."